So, What Do You Want to Do When you Grow Up?

The photo you see to the right is from 20 years ago when I worked at WMMR and was backstage at a concert. I was having the time of my life and you can see that I knew it. Leather pants were in and my Doc Martin’s with a huge heel were on just right. I worked in production and met many fun bands, music lovers, DJ’s and producers.

When I had just moved to Swarthmore back in 2004, after a time of living in San Francisco, my niece Carly and I were standing in my apartment and I asked her as I leaned down to her then 5 year old frame, “What do you want to be for Halloween, Carly?” I loved her little cheeks. She was the cutest. A little love bug. She responded, “A witch.” I was so excited, as I knew I was going to go to Delaware to walk with her on Halloween. She then asked, “Holly, what do you want to be when you grow up?” I was taken aback by this little 5 year old as we stood in my dining room when I was 34 years old. Um, like what do you mean? Uh…I have a job at Pottery Barn and I just started a business making jewelry. Well, of course I knew this is a little girl and this little girl sees me as her “little” buddy and her buddy wears similar clothes minus the ABC’s on her pants.

What I love so much about my job (working at home) is that I can listen to music and I can listen to it as loud as I want it with my headphones on. As I sit here cleaning up after creating some earrings and repairing a necklace, I can’t help but ponder, what is it that I really want to do? Or, what did I want to do. “Carly, don’t you know that even at age 48, you still may not know what you want to do?” All of us, if we could..might change our field. I worked in radio for 8 years. I don’t necessarily miss working in radio. College radio was great, but working for WMMR/WMGK and Greater Media was fun only for all of the cool people I met and for all of the bands I got to see live and music I was introduced to. I made some friends that will always be friends and we will always have the connection of music among other things. There is something about that that no one else can replace. We all have a secret code between us. Like a secret handshake. We are music fanatics. While others worship The Philadelphia Eagles, we are off on our own plane talking about a band that not many know of.

Which brings me to this paragraph. If I could do anything and do what I really want to do, I would work in the land of Tinseltown/ NYC/Nashville producing albums for bands. There have only been a few things in my life that I know I am really good at and one of those things is jewelry and the second thing is music. I know music. I know it inside and out and I can tell you what is missing in a song. Or, what needs to be taken out. Where did they (the band) go wrong, or how they can make it better. So, production is what has been calling me. It always has and I did production when working in radio. If it’s not that, I could be a music critic. Who needs one, right? A critic can help launch an album or can destroy it and well, that’s not my gig. Everyone has their own thermometer, or gauge on what good music is and I was asked several years ago to be a music critic for a Philadelphia magazine called Rockpile and I said “no.” The pay was horrible and very part time, but I also did not want to be responsible for possibly leading folks astray on a certain band. No thanks. I like a band called ‘Sleigh Bells’ and you don’t listen to them everyday, or even for an hour. Honestly, they really do not have true musical talent, the talent they have is in sounding over the top and using major synthesizers and loops and most music fiends do not consider them even music, but someone like Rick Rubin appreciates what they are about and so do I. They are pure adrenaline. They serve a purpose. You roller-skate to them. Are you laughing? We all need music to roller-skate to.

The thing about being in music, you can’t like just one style of music. You have to open yourself up to all forms, or you shouldn’t be in production because you will have someone come into a studio and you will not remain impartial. You have to pull from all corners and just hear it for what it is and make it work. Not just make it work, but bring the zing that you have to offer to the sound/music, that is if the band likes your zing. You also need to like all forms of music to become better at your craft. Everything is borrowed. Everything, so in order to really be a good musician, it works to really open your ears and your mind to all kinds of music.

As I was cleaning up after making a pair of earrings, I was thinking, this CD I am listening to is so good. It still takes me back to a time and place and most who know me, would never even think I would like this CD, ‘Dead Can Dance,’ but it’s brilliant. My mom always said, “It sounds like a circus. Like some awful circus. Are we under a tent? Where are the clowns?” I still laugh at this. I am sorry that she never got it. Or, that in her mind, Soundgarden was devil worshipping music. The devil must have been insulted.

Artists generally thrive through using their senses. That is a known fact. We are very passionate people who live through sight, sound, smell, taste and touch. Most of us can’t have one without the other. When I mention artists, I do not mean a painter, or photographer or one who has a business as an artist. I mean engineers, web designers, cooks, anyone who creates. Music lovers are feelers. They feel things and relate to words.

Alas, I am here making jewelry and I just had an order for a necklace and you know, I am happy that this is my gig. I love it actually. I was up until 4 am last night creating, which some think is crazy, but it’s how my body works and as much as it doesn’t jive with others schedules, it works for me. It’s a busy time of year. I have a lot of pieces to make, a lot of pieces to sell and a few pieces by others that need to be repaired. It’s good. I am happy and I am lucky because many do not get paid to do what they love. They make nickels and dimes. I do not, or I wouldn’t do it. Having said that, it’s a seasonal business. Music is all year long.

BUT, when I come back the next time around….you will find me in a studio with a band doing what I do best. “Let’s strip it down, or let’s fire it up and bring in this instrument.” I am sure many saw Sonic Highways with The Foo Fighters. I watched that series and I was so disappointed that Dave Grohl did not step out of his comfort zone in Nashville. His other bandmates were so into throwing a country vibe into one song on that then new album, but he was hell bent on staying true to his comfort zone of safe rock and roll. He missed it. Completely. Dave, are you listening? Step out of your comfort zone and make some music that actually sounds different. You were awesome in ‘Nirvana,’ you stepped it up for ‘Queens of The Stone Age’ and ‘Them Crooked Vultures’ with John Paul Jones. Do it in your band, The Foo’s.

Sorry, but yes, The Foo’s had it going on in the beginning, but now every song they make sounds the same.

I was just a critic, wasn’t I? Oops. That’s alright, they will reign supreme to many no matter what I say.